The Downside of New Year Resolutions
By Dilshani Palugaswewa-2017-12-31Ceylon Today Features
As Christmas has come to an end and the New Year is just around the corner, of course, everyone is all geared up to step into the year 2018 while mulling over what their new year's resolution will be. A New Year's resolution which is rightly defined as a promise one makes to oneself – usually means either the ending of a bad habit or the developing of a good habit from the very first day of the year, which one intends to carry out throughout the year.
Although, we have many examples of resolution failures to our credit, most of us resort to the same strategic plan every December before being ambushed by the numbered days as we clock out of 31 December and arrive at the magical fizz that we hope 1 January holds, hankering on that this time, it will do the trick.
But then every year, 12 months down we find ourselves in the same old rabbit hole, forgetting why we couldn't follow through our previous resolutions. So we hop on it again, on to the very next January believing that this time, it has the energy of change.
While optimism is a good thing, remember the best possible, and most productive level of change is when it happens organically or at least when you have the fundamental understanding of why something was unsuccessful, rather than when it's enforced upon you. Thus, when it comes to New Year resolutions it can be tricky, because the only reason you're following through with your grand plan is because the digits of the year are going to change. Thus, keep in mind - your brain is partially unprepared to welcome the change that you have set with a new beginning of hope and evolution.
Otherwise, what unfolds is a three-ring circus. The goals you've set for yourself and the coming year will lose steam a few months into the 365 days, likely depicting you, as a failure along with reverberating a negative message in the ears of people you've confidently blown the trumpet, giving testament to how strong you are on your word. Because of course, at the beginning of the year, you plastered it all over social media and you're surroundings – "My New Year Resolution is ...."
So, to avoid such happenings and in order to understand this baffling belief we have in New Years that occurs time and time again, despite multiple failings - analyze.
Ever heard of False Hope Syndrome? If you haven't, then its time you did. In fact, this is the root causation for any failed resolutions you've had before.
False Hope Syndrome is basically when one sets a goal higher than their achievable capabilities along with miscalculating the speed of the execution of that task.
Moral of the story - look before you leap and think through the contingencies in order to cut the mustard. Without any consideration of strategies and viability, if one reaches for unattainable objectives, they are bound to fall short. As most resolutions are lifestyle and self-improvement changes, they have to be systematically aligned and tailored with one's potential.
Self-change methods can be effective if done right. Steps taken to improve one's mind, body and soul can be invigorating and optimistic. However, unrealistic expectations narrow the chances of any productive sustainability. While there is no problem in wanting a healthy lifestyle and wanting to wake up to a better version of yourself every day, overcoming fears and weaknesses - and just starting afresh, there lies a problem which occurs due to the aptitude we humans have of not learning how to walk before we start to run.
Own it! Change doesn't come easy. It has to be painstakingly thought through and acted out. Especially if you're trying to change negative attributes into positive ones. (There is no point in burning out a fire that you once kindled in order to bite the bullet.) And that is exactly what you need in order to sustain the same enthusiasm throughout the year. It is when you take those small steps first that you'll have a pretty good chance to make it further down the year than you would by taking longer strides with larger than life expectations.
The end result is a two way possibility. Either, (and this is the most likely possibility) you will be unsuccessful as you may lose sight and press the pause the button on the stairway to your resolution.
In which case, you will end up losing your marbles while you remain despondent for the months subsequent to that, with no hope of attempting to trace back the steps to re-resolution. Left with the belief that there is no possible way you can achieve that goal you had once set, it gives you no valid reason to go back to the drawing board. Or you could still be riding on that same fuel of optimism – so full of vim and vigour that you'd re-try the same algorithm with no changes made to the path you chose to go down the first time around.
But here's what you need to know to be on the ball.
Resolution = Change, thus you have to analyze why and how your resolutions fail.
If you're unaware of the three stages of changes, you are bound to fail.
Pre-contemplation
Contemplation
Preparation
Pre-contemplation is the first stage of change. Meaning - at this point you're probably wondering if or not to make the desired change and if it is worth the time and effort you plan to put in.
Contemplation - which is the second stage of change, is when you mentally experience the desired change without actually experiencing it. This way, you go through the pros and cons to mentally draw the picture and prepare yourself for the uphill battle. Visualizing your desired results, could pump up your enthusiasms and dedication levels to get things
started.
The third step of change is preparation. At this point, you understand that the desired change is essential to your life and thus will commit to go that extra few miles to see it through. This eventually turns into action which would be followed by productive results.
Bottom line - it is not pragmatic for you to take a leaf out of someone else's book to make changes to your life. Why twist your own arm, just as the year commences right? The way you kick start a new beginning is all in your hands.
Change in life will happen on the fly. So pull up your socks to learn and grow all year round. If there is no rhyme or reason to make new changes – then so be it. Nevertheless, you have 365 new days which comes with 365 new opportunities.
Here's to hoping that 2018 won't suck as much this year might have for you.
Happy New Year!
